To Judge Denny Chin,
I didn't want to accuse anyone of being overly subjective, and bringing in a bias prior to this case starting, but I'm starting to notice a serious slant in your reasoning, Judge, and I think it's time we address it.
Your very prejudiced against my client. Because you hate evil.
Look, my client was born this way. He was born evil. And your obvious bias and prejudice against his "evilness" just shows how corrupt our court has become. I could charge you for a hate crime against evil. It's not like my client just woke up one day and decided... "I am evil!" No. It was something he was born with, and has had to deal with on a daily basis.
I will be writing a formal letter to the New York Supreme Court declaring your prejudice, and hopefully we'll have a trial against you. Such unjust, biased judges should not be allowed in the courtroom.
I'll drop this charge if you reconsider my 12 year offer.